OCTOBER HAS COME AND GONE

OCTOBER IS HERE JUST AS PROMISED

October 1st 2026

October has finally returned just as promised. The first storm of the season happened only two days ago, and I can feel the onset of alcohol poisoning from Oíche Shamhna celebrations. 

The Bus Stop outside my College, car lights blinding my vision as the storm worsens. Cars pile up, unable to move as students fill the paths, struggling to get into a bus, car, or taxi. 

OCTOBER DISCOVERIES: Wednesdays Are The Greatest Day To Get Blackout 

Once I stated that Tuesdays are the most fun a girl can have. Decided to correct myself. Thursdays are the most fun a girl can have in late-summer, early-autumn evenings. Tuesday nights are the most fun a girl can have whilst melting mid-summer. Wednesdays are the greatest nights to blackout and escape the incoming Winter cold. I accidentally discovered this around three weeks ago, after what was supposed to be an unsuccessful night. The Roomates and I have developed this habit of breaking free from the comfort of The Local. Going to pubs and clubs we haven't been to before or aren't the most welcome in, as I open bathroom doors to see [Redacted] about to fight some homophobe in the men's bathroom line. I had just met two angels in the women’s bathroom. I’ve met more angels in pub bathrooms than I ever did around an altar. One of the angels came up to me later on in tears, desperately explaining through choked sobs how she had tried to stand up for her friend and my friend group to the group of lads who had been homophobic all night. I told her she didn’t have to, and shouldn’t, ruin her night. In truth, my friends don’t seem to care. I think a sick, scary part of them gets off on it. The thrill of it. Will I or will I not end up fighting this homophobe? Some sick, scary part of me likes watching the Will They Won’t They of it all. In reality, if the day ever does come that one of my friends ends up in a fight - no, I just pray it never happens. Ended up running out after the angel, still in tears, and wrapped my arms around her, thanking her and ushering her fellow angels to continue the night and have fun. I never even got the angel’s name.

Not long after the angels left, we left that pub and met up with one of the Roommates, who brought a full birthday bash with her. Tried to get into a pub we were too young for. Got rejected. Go figure. Ended up in The Fowl, another pub we never go to. Ended up staying until closing. Cocktails mixing with the vodka and god/only/knows/what/else/we/had been drinking. Early 2000s music blasting as we danced for hours. Feet sore from dancing. Even though The Fowl closed at 2 am, we didn’t get home until 4 am. Very interesting. Ended up back at The Fowl the Wednesday after, go figure.

FIRST WINTER DAY

First Winter Day. Frost covering the cars and teeth chattering as I sit behind The Shop in the dark. Stars are overlooking me. You can normally never see stars. Too much light pollution. Used to be able to see them a whole bunch as a child after Taekwondo lessons, driving into the driveway and staring up at them before opening the door to the warmth of a fireplace and my mother’s arms. Can’t remember the last time I really looked at the stars before this morning.
Sat on a crate out the back. Feeling tiny spiders hiking up my thighs towards my arms. I can see them too. They are just as tiny as the stars. Hard to see too. Feel them mostly. Feel the stars mostly too. Cup of tea in my lap, more so for warmth than anything. Only sense of feeling I have is in my lap.
It’s comforting at first. The spiders crawling up my legs. Sense of relief. Of not being alone in this cold, dark morning. But soon the comfort turns to chills as I feel them everywhere. Entering every crack , cut or hole of my body. Getting just barely under the skin but still visible. Tiny bubbles under my skin moving around, causing the hairs on my arm to stand up. Suddenly, I am very overwhelmed by the amount of them and wish I were alone. I can see them in my cup of tea. Swimming around. Throwing a grain of sugar between them. Start freaking out while calculating how many I must have drunk. Choked up. I can feel them. Coming back up my throat. Their spindly legs tickling my throat. Making me gag as they fight to survive the hike of my trachea.

#vandalised #rip #peace #stopilldie #shedied